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Well, I made a Facebook account...

Used my real name, though I hate that idea...Anyway, I searched for some people from my high school. Holy hell, most of them look so old, like they are about 50! I am only 36, so they are all about the same age as I am. But they look so old! This one girl was this beautiful blonde cheerleader type, and now she looks like a grandmother. These people used to make fun of me and call me ugly. Now who's laughing, bitches! Here I am, looking as if I am only in my 20s. Ok, there are some who still look decent, like this one girl who was very athletic. I wonder if she is still running. But most of them...shit. I may be fat, but I can lose weight easily. I do lose weight very quickly and easily, once I put my mind to it. I just have to want to do it.

Wow, I feel so much better now. It made my whole day to see what some of those bitches look like now. If there is one thing I was indeed blessed with, it is eternal youth. I once asked my mom if I will ever look my age and she said probably not.  If this is one thing I have going for me, looking like I am in my early 20s, then I am so glad for it.

I did try to contact the few who were kind to me, but the ones who made fun of me, forget it. I am not going to confront them about why they made fun of me and tormented me unless they contact me first. They probably won't anyway. If I wrote to them and said they were assholes for doing that to me then I would be no better than they were. I hope I hear back from the few nice ones. I remember the only guy in the class who ever told me that I was pretty. Of course I think he is married now. But it would be nice to be friends.

Now I am even more inspired to lose weight and put up pcitures of me on facebook and show those jerks what they could have had.
And try facebook to find my former coworkers. I refuse to try my space though, I hate that site. I have done facebook in the past. It was not all that bad. I left it because I was working at the time and got too busy to bother.
One of the reasons I want to find John Philip was that I always wanted to tell him that his constant preaching bothered me to the point where I was unable to work because it made me so angry. But I don't want him thinking that I dug him up again from the past just to tell him that. If I did even find him, should I bring that up?

Like I said before, those people were mostly older than I am and might not even be interested in Facebook or meeting people from their past. Who knows what will happen.

Writer's Block: Crystal Ball

All of August stretches before us today—what is your prediction for this month's weirdest or most unexpected news story?
Something about a certain singer not really being dead would not surprise me at all... but it would be weird. 

Looking back at my last entry...

I have to add that I am aware there are non - breeder fundies and also atheist fundies that are just as bad as breeder and religious fundies are. Those hardcore atheists are getting to be a real pain in the ass. No one can even so much as say the word God anymore without them getting all in an uproar and trying to sue.   

Another rainy, gloomy day.

Earlier this morning, I was thinking about another friend I missed from my former job. His name was John Philip. I was sick on his last day, so it was kind of sad that I never got to say goodbye. I was told that everyone was crying. I was sort of glad that I missed it, I get way too emotional at those things.
While he was a really nice guy and a great friend and all, He had his little annoying things about him as we all do. He was a religious fundie and a breeder fundie, the two worst kinds. I dislike all kinds of fundies. Political fundies are a pain also but they tend to be easier to ignore most of the time.

I understand that when people are passionate about something that makes them happy, they want to share it with absolutely everyone they know. But what I do not understand is if someone is not interested in whatever it is, why do they keep pushing it on someone?

For example, I am passionate about pets. Most people are all kid crazy. Me, I would rather have a pet than a kid any day. I would tell someone that I love pets and think that they are the greatest thing since sliced bread. But if someone shows no interest in pets, I would let it go. I certainly would not try to conivnce someone that doesn't like pets to have one. If that person does not feel that pets are their thing, then that is perfectly fine with me. And I most certainly would not try to concince someone that feels that they are too unhealthy to have and take care of a pet that they are healthy enough and should have one anyway. That would just lead to an unhappy situation, and who would end up suffering? The poor, innocent pet would.

I just don't think I will ever understand the mentality of a fundie. What is right for you is NOT always right for everyone.

By the way, this is not about anyone on my friends list so don't think it is you who I am talking about. If anything, it is about that guy I used to work with. Like I said, he was a great guy, don't get me wrong. But his preaching could be a real pain in the ass. All it did was make me angry and unable to focus on my work. I don't know, it was just something I was thinking about this morning while taking out the garbage. Funny, what I think of while taking out the trash.  

Writer's Block: Birthday Shout-out

Happy birthday, J.K. Rowling! Which of her seven Harry Potter novels do you think is the most satisfying read?
I hate Harry Potter. It was just never my thing.

Was thinking about my last entry...

I know that the odds of being reunited with my former friends are probably a million to one. But if I did find them, I wonder how much they have changed? I wonder if they look anything similar to how they did look, if they still live in the area, if they are working now. I wonder if they are even still alive? Who knows, maybe they aren't. I am pretty sure that at the time I knew them, Robin was older than I am now. (I am 36, for those that may not know.) And if I found them, I wonder if they would be interested in some kind of reunion. If they don't live in the area, it wouldn't be possible for me at this time unless they were to come here. But anyway, like I said, I will probably never find them. 
There is also a guy at that job that I was friends with that I would like to see again. A black male who in the 90s was probably in his early 20s named Sonica Drummer. He was also fired from the job. I saw him once when he returned to get back this kung fu movie he lent me. Then I never heard from him after that. Then there was also this girl Gladys, who I would like to at least know what happened to her. However, being friends with her again would be iffy because she accused another male friend of mine who worked there of sexual harrassment.  

I don't know why but lately I have been thinking a lot about people from my past. Just wondering what has become of them. If I could at least know what is up with them now, I would be satisfied with that.

Looking for two former friends...

I was friends with these two women from a former job. I can't say where I worked here for it would be too easy for someone to find me. But let's just say, they lived near Northern New Jersey around the early '90s. Actually, one lived in Upstate New York, but she commuted here. Her name was Robin Brooks. The last I saw of her, she landed a great new job, said her happy but tearful goodbyes and left. Have not seen her since. The other person, Laura Harris, left the job on very bad terms. I believe she was fired. She came back to visit once and then never saw her again.  Robin was a short black lady with curly hair and glasses. Laura was a tall, slender blonde lady. Both were in their late 30s - early 40s at the time. Not positive of Laura's age though, she could have been early thirties. I hope I can find them. We had some great times together. I will never forget the time we went to a motel with these guys we met at a bar, and we stole a motel room key and snuck in. Of course, now I wouldn't do anything like that. LOL. But anyway, if anyone out there feels that they fit this description, contact me. I know the chances of me actually finding them are slim to none. But it is worth a try. I have posted a shorter description on my twitter too.

Writer's Block: Let's Be Friends

After a break-up, do you try to remain friends with your former flame? Does it work?
I am trying to remain friends with someone right now, as my readers know and it is so hard. It is hard not to just talk to him the way I did before. It is so hard when he shows me a picture of him and a girl that he likes in real life. Being just friends with someone I broke up with for me is not easy, because I always take it personally and think that he just doesn't like me anymore. Especially if they dump me in a mean way, then say that they are sorry and want to be friends. I feel like he wants to be just friends because he feels sorry for me. I am still so hurt by the way he dumped me, and I know that I act much differently with him now. I only ever even talk to him if he talks to me first. I think he noticed that, and I think he knows why though he hasn't said anything yet. I just don't even feel that I have the right to be his friend. I am not good enough. I don't need to be interfering in his life anymore.

Wow, what a question to wake up to.


I just found a white gummy bear in a bag of gummy cola bottles. I was thinking I should become one of those sue - happy people and file a lawsuit. Make up some elaborate story about gummi bears bringing back some kind of traumatic memories or something. LOL. Think any lawyer would take that case?