Used my real name, though I hate that idea...Anyway, I searched for some people from my high school. Holy hell, most of them look so old, like they are about 50! I am only 36, so they are all about the same age as I am. But they look so old! This one girl was this beautiful blonde cheerleader type, and now she looks like a grandmother. These people used to make fun of me and call me ugly. Now who's laughing, bitches! Here I am, looking as if I am only in my 20s. Ok, there are some who still look decent, like this one girl who was very athletic. I wonder if she is still running. But most of them...shit. I may be fat, but I can lose weight easily. I do lose weight very quickly and easily, once I put my mind to it. I just have to want to do it.
Wow, I feel so much better now. It made my whole day to see what some of those bitches look like now. If there is one thing I was indeed blessed with, it is eternal youth. I once asked my mom if I will ever look my age and she said probably not. If this is one thing I have going for me, looking like I am in my early 20s, then I am so glad for it.
I did try to contact the few who were kind to me, but the ones who made fun of me, forget it. I am not going to confront them about why they made fun of me and tormented me unless they contact me first. They probably won't anyway. If I wrote to them and said they were assholes for doing that to me then I would be no better than they were. I hope I hear back from the few nice ones. I remember the only guy in the class who ever told me that I was pretty. Of course I think he is married now. But it would be nice to be friends.
Now I am even more inspired to lose weight and put up pcitures of me on facebook and show those jerks what they could have had.
- Mood:
cheerful
One of the reasons I want to find John Philip was that I always wanted to tell him that his constant preaching bothered me to the point where I was unable to work because it made me so angry. But I don't want him thinking that I dug him up again from the past just to tell him that. If I did even find him, should I bring that up?
Like I said before, those people were mostly older than I am and might not even be interested in Facebook or meeting people from their past. Who knows what will happen.
- Mood: calm
- Mood: calm
- Mood:
bored
Earlier this morning, I was thinking about another friend I missed from my former job. His name was John Philip. I was sick on his last day, so it was kind of sad that I never got to say goodbye. I was told that everyone was crying. I was sort of glad that I missed it, I get way too emotional at those things.
While he was a really nice guy and a great friend and all, He had his little annoying things about him as we all do. He was a religious fundie and a breeder fundie, the two worst kinds. I dislike all kinds of fundies. Political fundies are a pain also but they tend to be easier to ignore most of the time.
I understand that when people are passionate about something that makes them happy, they want to share it with absolutely everyone they know. But what I do not understand is if someone is not interested in whatever it is, why do they keep pushing it on someone?
For example, I am passionate about pets. Most people are all kid crazy. Me, I would rather have a pet than a kid any day. I would tell someone that I love pets and think that they are the greatest thing since sliced bread. But if someone shows no interest in pets, I would let it go. I certainly would not try to conivnce someone that doesn't like pets to have one. If that person does not feel that pets are their thing, then that is perfectly fine with me. And I most certainly would not try to concince someone that feels that they are too unhealthy to have and take care of a pet that they are healthy enough and should have one anyway. That would just lead to an unhappy situation, and who would end up suffering? The poor, innocent pet would.
I just don't think I will ever understand the mentality of a fundie. What is right for you is NOT always right for everyone.
By the way, this is not about anyone on my friends list so don't think it is you who I am talking about. If anything, it is about that guy I used to work with. Like I said, he was a great guy, don't get me wrong. But his preaching could be a real pain in the ass. All it did was make me angry and unable to focus on my work. I don't know, it was just something I was thinking about this morning while taking out the garbage. Funny, what I think of while taking out the trash.
- Mood:
blah
- Mood:
awake
There is also a guy at that job that I was friends with that I would like to see again. A black male who in the 90s was probably in his early 20s named Sonica Drummer. He was also fired from the job. I saw him once when he returned to get back this kung fu movie he lent me. Then I never heard from him after that. Then there was also this girl Gladys, who I would like to at least know what happened to her. However, being friends with her again would be iffy because she accused another male friend of mine who worked there of sexual harrassment.
I don't know why but lately I have been thinking a lot about people from my past. Just wondering what has become of them. If I could at least know what is up with them now, I would be satisfied with that.
- Mood: okay
- Mood: calm
Wow, what a question to wake up to.
- Mood: awake
- Mood: amused
I read an article where this taxi driver was blamed when these parents left a sleeping kid in the back. I forgot to save that article and now I can't find it, but that is bullshit. Since when is it everyone else's job to watch your children? And how can you possbly not know you left your own child behind? I do understand that he was supposed to check the back...but ultimately, it is the parent's responsibility.
I don't know, the things that go on in this world nowadays. Is it any wonder that no one can accept any responsibility for their own actions? And no wonder people are so quick to sue over the most insignificant injustices that happen in their lives. Also, no matter what it is, there is bound to be a money hungry lawyer who will take the case no matter how ridiculous it is.
- Mood: okay
- Mood: calm
Oh well. I'm not going to whine about it today. Stuff happens.
It is already 9:20 am? Doesn't feel that late, but that is because it is dark and gloomy outside.
At least today I will have something to do. It is new badge day on Pogo.
My other plans for today are to rest and get better. Maybe watch some dvds or listen to music.
- Mood:
sick
I do feel a little bit better than I did this morning. I think I should finally be all better by the end of the week. Hopefully I will anyway.
Been playing on Pogo a lot. Spent a lot of tokens on stuff for my mini so I need to earn more tokens.
Sorry about my bitchyness in the last few entries, its mostly because I had not been feeling well.
- Mood: calm
Another $50.00 down the drain.
But at least I won't be in any more pain.
The bright side is, at least it was not one of those super expensive medications. Still, I am pretty pissed. They wonder why I never get better. If they had just let me continue the xolair that I was on, which was working for me in the first fucking place, I probably would not be this sick now. Assholes. I hope they are really sick someday, and someone denies them something that will make them feel just a tiny bit better. Or better yet, I hope it happens to someone they love and they have to sit and watch them suffer.
- Mood:
bitchy
http://jobs.aol.com/articles/2009/06/28/w
Quit lumping people into categories! Who gives a flying fuck if someone's desk is messy, neat, has pictures on it or not, whatever. As long as it isn't violating any company policies and you can still get your work done and are a good worker, who gives a crap? Really, the stuff these people come up with. We label and judge each other enough as it is! Who has that much time to sit around and be so observant of what others are doing?
- Mood: annoyed
Somehow I am not in a good mood today.
I try to think positive thoughts and focus on what I do want and not what I don't want. It doesn't always work. It seems like there is so much more of what we don't want in the world.
I get so tired of war, killing, violence, sickness, poverty, and not just for myself but for everyone going through these things.
I am tired of insurance companies and doctors that just don't care and are making a huge profit off of sick people who just want to have a better life, while they live in mansions and go on fancy vacations.
I am tired of being alone. There are no single guys my age, and the few times I do ever meet one, it turns out that they don't want the same things as I do in life. Or, they don't like me because I am not some blonde barbie doll. Why is it so much harder for me to find someone? There are women three times bigger than I am that still have someone.
I am tired of this recession and tired of there not being any jobs. This was supposed to be the land of opportunity. Now it is slowly becoming the land of nothing.
We are constantly promised that things will get better. I really don't even believe that anymore. We are so content with killing each other that we don't realize that we are destroying ourselves in the process.
- Mood: bitchy
This is one of those writer's blocks that I don't really relate to much but I answer just because I am bored.
- Mood: blah
We are finally getting some real summer weather here. Today temps were up to 87 degrees.
- Mood: calm
I still don't think my parents were the greatest parents in the world. I felt I did not see them very often at all and most of the time I was left in the care of a babysitter, which I feel is wrong. If parents want kids, one of the parents should stay home and watch them. You had this kid, you take care of it. Can't afford to do that? Too damn bad, don't have kids then. But that is just my opinion and it is not up to me to dictate whether people should send their child to a babysitter and both go off to work or not.
Anyway, to make a long story short, for most of the time I am on good terms and consider myself friends with my parents. I know that they got married young and made their share of mistakes as everyone does.
- Mood: calm
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